Armchair Pundits

A Generation of Beggars

Last night we had company over for supper. It was not the typical evening, however. On two occasions within about thirty minutes the doorbell rang. Upon hearing it I gave my typical response as I walked to the door: “Go away.” My wife suspected that it might be the Schwann’s man. But, I reminded her that is was not Monday. As I approached the door on both occasions, I discovered that my front step was now occupied by street urchins … err … I mean young children. Perhaps these young waifs have lost their dog and are wondering if I had found it. Unfortunately, I was not to be so lucky.

The first group of elementary children informed me that they were raising funds for the elementary school down the block to purchase books and other educational materials. (Don’t I pay taxes so the schools can buy books?) I politely told them that I was not interested and sent them on their way. The second group of young high school girls were raising money for their sports team by doing chores and cleaning. I was in luck I thought. I need some cheap labor … err … I mean energetic volunteers to help me sod over my weed infested flower garden. But, no. They were cleaning up ditches and cemeteries. (Again, am I not already funding this in some manner?) Alas, I sent them on their way empty handed.

Now, however, I was quite upset. Twice in one evening, I had been beset upon by beggars in the comfort of my own home. I am half-tempted to write a letter to my local school board demanding a cessation to all fund raising activities. The school district just passed a large levy referendum two years back and now they send the students out hat-in-hand to ask for more money. I suspect that instead of using my tax dollars to fund the teachers and students, they have used the increase to fund their bloated top-heavy administration (how many principals do we really need and does the superintendent really need to lease that SUV at our expense?).

So, the assault of the panhandlers begins. “We need new play ground equipment.” “We need new sports equipment.” “We need new books.” “We need desks for our classrooms.” “We need pencils to write with.” Any moment I expect a rather plump elderly gentleman with a white beard and a safari jacket to jump out of my bushes and tell me that I can provide a good education to these children for less than the cost of a cup of coffee each day. WAIT A MINUTE! These kids aren’t from some third-world country. They live down the block. And besides I’m already funding them. I want to quote Ebenezer Scrooge to these young beggars. “I help to support the establishments that I have mentioned.” (I’ll leave out the part about decreasing the surplus population.) Unfortunately such a comment would be wasted on their un-read minds.

It hasn’t happened yet, but the one I hate the most is the student who comes to your door asking you to help fund their trip to Europe. I want to scream, “You want money to go on a trip …. Get a Job!”

We are teaching our children a bad lesson. We are teaching them how to beg. I, however, will have no part in it. Tomorrow, I put up the “no soliciting” sign. I just hope the schools have taught our children how to read.

posted by Squirrel @ 9:17 AM